12 days Post Partum

Hey There

I am now at 12 days post partum, and i am proud to announce that i am back to my Pre-preggo weight.... but thats probably due to not having a uterus anymore, also i wasnt able to eat ANYTHING the first 6 days post OP everything made me sick, it was awful. I am now able to eat normal THANK GOD, there is nothing more awful than being HUNGRY but not being able to eat. Here are my first "progress pictures" i wont be able to workout for AT LEAST 6 months due to the vertical incision on my skin

My Scar is looking A LOT better already, which makes me SUPER happy.

a close up

 not much Preggo belly left :( i miss it already...

I bought a post partum Belly band to help my body to heal faster. It fits nicely, not too snug!. We will see if it actually helps any lol.

Hubby bought me some Victoria Secret panties, and i LOVE them :D i never had anything from VS besides the Sweat pants / jacket that he ruined a few months ago lol.

My in laws left today :( we were all heartbroken, but it was the hardest for the Girls. I hope they have a safe journey home!.

we took those pics right before they left

we are planing on visiting them in December for christmas <3

9 Days post partum

Well Hello Hello my Dear readers. Its been 9 days since Miss Allison made her grand entrance.
Its been a rough 9 days im not gonna lie. This vertical incision is A LOT harder to deal with then thought, BUT i  keep going and try to cope with the pain the best way i possibly can. Last week sunday i ended up in the L & D ward because something wasnt quite right with my foley catheter. They removed the old one and put a new one in place. And HOLY HELL that shit hurt. I had catheters placed before and they were uncomfortable BUT not painful. But my Bladder spasmed which made it harder to push the catheter int my bladder. I was in tears by the time the nurse was done.
I woke up with HORRIBLE pain only 2 days after having my catheter replaced. I called my OB/GYN and explained that i did not pass any urine through my catheter. they had me come in right away, they were worried that my bladder bursts.
So we went to temple and a nurse came in with a new catheter... All i could think was " OH Fuck no, not again" i told the nurse that i rather not have another one put in place, that i had it done 2 days ago, and that i think that the one i have now is clogged up since i was able to pass urine on my own after i pushed that balloon in my bladder up.
My OB/GYN came in shortly after and asked how i am doing i explained the whole thing to him and he said he is going to talk to urology to see what they say. He then looked at me, shook his head, and said " You are tough i dont know how you do it"
He came back shortly after, and said urology is waiting for me, he left the catheter in place so they can fill my bladder with the contrast liquid. They filled my bladder with almost 200 ML and clamped the catheter, it felt like i am about to burst, the most uncomfortable feeling i've felt. BUT we did get some good pics

The structure of a normal bladder is smooth. Part of my Bladder is rigid { see circled} thats what they wanted to take a closer look at. NO leakage or tears YAY. That meant i was able to get rid of the catheter. The removal this time was not painful at all. I left the hospital a Happy camper lol. 

TODAY was the day i dreaded the most. STAPLE REMOVAL i was terrified, because i never had an incision that big. But the nurses were really nice and the 35 + staples were removed in no time and only a few were Painful.

looks  A LOT better if you ask me :) I still have a hard time getting used to the huge scar, but then i look at my little miracle baby and i KNOW why i go through the things i currently go though. I am starting to ease up on the pain meds. I dont take them regularly  anymore, only when i really need them.

I am currently on 2 different types of Pain Killers + iron + Stool softener +  Antibiotics

Little miss Allison is doing GREAT. We enrolled her in deers today and on friday we will get her into tricare and set up with an Pediatrician. She passed her hearing only on the right side but the nurse said its probably because her ear canals are super tiny. Her bilirubin is FINALLY going down { it was a 15.9 on sunday i think} we have been sunbathing since and her color has improved :) Her umbilical cord is about to fall off so that means lil missy will get a REAL bath soon :D Shes such a good baby, sleeping a solid 2-3 hours at night i feel very blessed. Right now she snoozing away in her little crib.

First update

First update


Its been a few days since i updated last so i thought i would FINALLY fill you guys in about miss Allison arrival <3

FIRST OFF I want to explain our decision to "trick" everyone about the day Allison was born. No one really knew but a few selected ppl, I knew everyone was antsy to meet baby and was stalking my profile probably a few times a week lol we said its Tuesday, when it was planned for Monday all along for she sake of my sanity.


Well T and I Left on Monday at 0500 the hospital was about 30 minutes away ago we wanted to make sure we get there before 0600. Once we got to the hospital, we checked into L&D I got a "pretty" hospital gown, and was hooked up to I.V's. then I was transferred to the main OR recovery were i was prepped for surgery and around 07:45 I was FINALLY wheeled into the operating room.
It broke my husbands heart to let me go, I could see it in his eyes. The OR was overflowing with specialists, students & nurses etc it. Right before surgery started the doc informed me that he has to make a vertical incision, I was overwhelmed and all I wanted was my husband to be there. It seemed like it took forever for them to FINALLY let me sleep.
I woke up at 1320 in the afternoon. They worked on me for over 5 hours, and had to do massive reconstruction on my bladder. I asked millions of questions about Allison but no one seemed to know ANYTHING it drove me insane. I did find out that my bladder was more in loved then first thought and that I lost almost three liters of blood. I received 2 units during surgery alone!.
I basically forced myself to wake up and shake this nasty anesthesia ASAP so I can see my husband and baby.
They finally started to wheel me up and as they drove me past the L& D nursery I spotted Tom standing over OUR baby's crib. He seemed to relieved and smiled his bright beautiful smile when he seen me.
He followed us to our room , he was the one that told me that they worked on my for over five hours, and filled me in on our daughters condition. She was born with 6 pound 4 oz and 19 inches long <3 she wasn't able to keep
Her temp up so they placed her under the heater.
I got to hold my little miracle for the first time at almost 6 hours old.
We kangarooed for hours and at 1630 I finally got to nurse her for the first time. She has been feeding like a champ since the day we left the hospital and my milk came in that very same day (18th) the hospital stay was OK but I'm glad I was released after only 2 days . The catheter is still in place due to the bladder reconstruction but should be removed next week along with the staples. The scar almost had me in tears when the doc first removed the dressing. A total of over 35 staples was used and they basically cut me open 2 fingers wide above my pubic bone all the way up to my belly button. {see picture below but beware its graphic}
My husband has been a blessing these past days, more then usually. Not many guys will step in the shower with you to help you wash off all the post operation nastiness or empty out your catheter. He does all of that and more without complaining.
When we were released from the hospital miss Allison's bilirubin levels where a bit elevated and they weren't too happy with the weight she lost so we had to go back in and have weight/bilirubin checked again. She lost an additional oz since yesterday and her bilirubin doubled. So we have to go back to temple tomorrow to start "phototherapy"
I hope her weight improves I'm always worried about not supplying enough nutrition.

{4 DaysToGo} I had my LAST OB/GYN Appointment today, i  had to sign a few consent forms & also got bloodwork done. The doc went over the procedure with me and said he basically expects me to need Blood transfusion due to the severety of my Placenta Percreta {jup its not just an Accreta anymore -.- }. I told him that i want hubby to be informed and brought to the baby ASAP. I want hubby to Kangaroo with the lil one to  get that immediate bonding with baby since i will not be able to provide that. 


I told tom that i feel like i am being punished for something.... First i was told i couldnt VBAC due to a placenta previa, and as soon as i got somewhat used to the thought of having a Cesarean i was told i have an Accreta..... NOW its a Percreta { involvement of other organs} i REALLY try to stay positive & and focus on having this baby, but im not gonna lie, its Hard. I am grateful for my wonderful husband who has been my rock in all of this!.   I know i shouldn't feel so damn sorry for myself, but i am a Huge Cry baby at the moment lol

Anyway, by measures almost 7 pounds at this point {thats FABULOUS news} i asked him about the measurments of baby's limbs and he said this late into the game, its really hard to get a good clear pic of the limbs so thats probably why they were measuring behind.

i talked to the Anesthesologist this AM and i am now good to go, Dr was happy that i had my blood drawn TODAY instead of the morning of the surgery.

My Hospital Gown arrived today and i LOVE it. A Friend of mine made a gown for me as well, it should get here on Monday <3 CANT WAIT

My In laws will get here on Sunday WOOHOO that means hubby will stay in the hospital with me. That makes me SUPER happy :D 

Random update

{5DaysToGo} I just tucked my hubby in after his 24 hour shift.  I will let him sleep for a few hours and then its off to get a few last minute things we need for Baby.
We are planing on setting up Annabells old bed in the Livingroom downstairs for whenever i come home. I dont want to be confined in my Bedroom all day, i want to enjoy the company of m Inlaws and be a active part of the daily routine. Its going to be SO hard to just sit back and recover. Ill have my Wonderful husband AND in laws around to help me
I am watching "a Baby's Story" on TLC, and cry every time a new bundle of joy enters tis worl. I cry because i am SO happy for the parents but i also cry because i am jealous { silly i know} i wanted a Vaginal birth SO bad. I wanted to welcome my Baby into this world and not be strapped to a damn OR bed. I had SO much time now to "get used" to the fact that it will definitel be a Cesarean, but everytime i came somewhat close to accepting it, something else got thrown at us. But i know everything will be OK as long as i have my wonderful little family with me to support me

So.excited

At 11:33 am this morning I FINALLY got the call / answer that I have been waiting for the last couple weeks/months.
on Tuesday I will get to hold my baby!!!!!! 7 days and counting ahhhhhh I am super excited! I have two appointments on Friday the first appointment is for paperwork and bloodwork. The second with the obgyn to discuss the procedure! He just send me the statement hubby needs to request his block leave hopefully his unit approves it

Dr. Visit.

Well there are a few good and lots of bad news after today's visit. The good news is, the doc that is going to deliver the baby is really nice and I actually feel comfortable with Him. { he commented on My English - said it was perfect- so that gave him plus points LOL} then, he said they have quite a few cases like mine at the hospital, so they KNOW what they are doing, and they are stoking up on my blood type. We did not get to schedule the c-section just yet, my dr. Will have to check his OR schedule and give me a call. But we will definitely have the baby by the end of next week.
He explained that different high risk docs will be present at the c-section, as well as the NICU, that's really comforting. I just hope everything goes smooth and I will be to hold baby ASAP.
Now the bad news. Since I have a severe case of previa / accreta I will have to have general anesthesia, which means hubby will NOT be allowed in the OR. I am SUPER bummed about this, but it's whats safest for me and baby! The doc explained the procedure to me.
After baby is born They will clamp the umbilicus cord and put it back into my uterus { to prevent blood loss} then they stitch my uterus back up {again to prevent excess bleeding} and remove the uterus and part of my bladder. That is going to take a few hours..... A few hours that I will not get to see or hold my baby :(
I told DH that as soon as baby leaves the OR I want him to go with baby, there is no need for him to sit in front of the OR while I have surgery. I want him to be the one to hold baby no one else.

We also got to see baby again :) I am a lil worried about the measurements. Baby's head and abdomen etc measure ahead, but baby's arms and legs measure short.
Now this could have a simple explanation, such as not getting good enough pictures of the FL to get correct measurements etc so I try not to worry about this, but everyone that knows me, knows that I will worry anyway.

This is it for today, I am off to snuggle with my loved ones

Last Night i had a huge breakdown. I am so overwhelmed with this situation right now. I am SO done being pregnant, i want to hold my Baby so bad and i am scared that the new doc will let me go longer then i expect. But then on the other hand i am NOT ready to have baby yet, because i am not ready to give up having baby inside of me, kicking, rolling & pushing. does that makes sense??
Then i am depressed over being away from my kids, I've ever really been separated from them, and while i know that they are well taken care of, i still worry. ALSO i dont know if i want my In-laws and kids to drive up to the hospital with us, or have them wait here and come over once baby is born and we are settled into a Room. I dont know how surgery is going to go, and if i have to go to the ICU i wont be able to see my kids.
I am also worried that my OB/GYN will not agree to my Birth plan or that i have to go to the main OR or have to have general anesthesia. So many things are still unclear which drives me INSANE. I know its only a few more days until i meet the new doc but WHAT IF he is not going to discuss any of the issues because he wants to do some more testing beforehand. 


But i do know one thing for sure. I want Bells and Hailey to meet their new sibling first.... alone..... I want to give them a few minutes to JUST meet baby, hold baby and get to know baby. I want that bonding time to be as special as possible for Me, Tom and our kids.
Well thats my rant for today, now i am off to spend some time with my Kiddos. 

GAAAAAH

time is DRAGGING, i am going out of my mind. I will meet my new doc in 5 days, i am SO scared he will say that he wont do the surgery until 39 weeks. I KNOW its best for baby to stay put as long as possible, BUT i am totally freaking out about going into labor before my C-section date.
If i should go into labor, the chances are really high that i start to bleed, due to the Previa. That would put baby and me in danger.
The Nurse at Scott & white said they usually deliver baby's where mom has previa early, i just dont know if the doc wants to run more tests before surgery, there isnt much time left until Baby is considered Full term.
I am having contractions on and off but nothing too painful or frequent enough to go to L&D. I am trying to keep it easy and rest as much as possible for today {hubby is on CQ again}

I wish everyone a wonderful 4th of July.

Birth plan

Today i met my Doula Anika. We had a nice long chat, not just about the Pregnancy, but about A LOT of other things. We even discovered that our husbands served in Iraq together { small small world huh}. Well she encouraged me to type up a Birth plan. I always thought birth plans are only for natural deliveries but boy was i wrong. She gave me a GREAT sample letter and i typed up a few myself. I thought i would give you a sneak peek.


Birth Plan for the Bxx family

GENERAL INFORMATION:

Mother's first and last name:  Jennifer Bxx
Father's first and last name:  Thomas Bxx
Sibilings Names : Annabell Melina & Hailey Marie
Due Date:  August 13th 2012
Other support people:  Doula Anika Hayes
Name of obstetrician:

 DURING DELIVERY / RECOVERY &  REGARDING BABY  – In the event a general anesthesia needs to be performed, I understand that some of my requests cannot be honored.

1. I would like my privacy and dignity to be respected at all times
2. I would like to carry out the shaving myself at home
3. I would like to meet the staff member in the OR who wil be participating in the Cesarean.
4. Explain all medications that will be used to me. I prefer bolus and oral medications versus PCA afterwards.
5. I would like to take photos & videos of the birth of my baby. I respect that the surgeon and the anesthesiologist may not want the entire surgery on video, however i would like a record of my Baby being born to make it as personal as possible.
6.  I would prefer the use of spinal/epidural
7. i would like for the Catheter to be put in after the spinal
8. I would like my arms not to be strapped down so i may touch my baby freely
9. If I should need to have a general anesthetic we would like my partner to stay so he is present at our baby’s birth and can hold him or her,
10. I prefer not to have any students present at the birth
11. We would like to have a commentary of what is happening up to and including the birth / for the whole time spent in theater
12. Please do not remove my ovaries or anything else that isnt medically necessary.
13.  I prefer to have dissolvable stitches
14. please lower the curtain and hold my baby up so i can see him/her at the moment of birth.
15. We / My partner would like to cut the cord
16. i would like my baby placed skin to skin on my chest immediately after basic assessments while in the OR. My husband can hold baby there with a warm blanket over my Baby.
17. I would like for my husband and baby to stay in the OR with me while surgery is completed and remain in recovery with me.
18.I request my baby not to be bathed or fully dressed until i have the opportunity to touch, cuddle etc with my Baby and i am able to participate in the Bathing.
19. We would like to hold our baby immediately.
20.  If the baby needs medical assistance requiring leaving the OR i'd like for my doula to attend me in the OR while my husband goes with the baby so i am not alone
21. We would like to be consulted if our baby needs to go to special care
22. If the baby needs to go to special care we would like to be taken to him/her as soon as possible after the operation
23. Delaying immunizations, even eye ointment and vitamin K
24. NO tests shall be performed or medications administered, etc without my or my husbands consent & prior knowledge
25. I would like to be offered regular pain relief which does not conflict with my desire to breastfeed. This includes not being given a drug that will make me too drowsy
26. Please limit persons who touch or attend my baby to only those on staff as needed and my husband.
27. I intend to breastfeed on demand
28. I would like our baby with me at all times unless I request otherwise
29. If someone arrives to visit, please check with my husband or I as to whether we are up for company before allowing them in our room.
30. I will breastfeed exclusively, NO Pacifiers, NO Glucose water, NO Formula should be given to my Baby



I know that some of these points might be a No Go { such as hubby being there if i have a general anesthesia but its worth a try right ????

Labor & Delivery tour

We had our L&D tour today, and i have to say i LOVE the hospital.. We were greeted by a really nice nurse, her name is Dawn and i really hope she will be there when i have baby. I told her a little about my Issues and explained that i will have to have a C-section, so she showed us the recovery room and told us that they actually have TWO OR's one on the L&D floor and the "main OR' she explained that Hubby will only be able to be with me during the C-section if i have the C-section at the L&D OR, and ONLY if i have a Epidural. I am praying that Hubby will be able to be with me. What i really like is that the baby will be with me in the recovery room {unless baby has breathing issues}. she also showed us the "postpartum rooms" Every room {single bed} has a TV, internet and a sleep sofa so hubby will be able to stay with me at the hospital after i have baby!. which is fantastic, that gives T time to bond with baby.

Dawn said that patients with a Planned C-section + hysterectomy usually go home after 3-4 days. I asked her what would happen to baby IF something goes wrong and i would end up in the ICU. She said that the baby's usually stay in the nursery OR in the NICU. In that case i would have to pump BM an have Hubby feed baby { or the nurse at night because hubby wouldn't be able to stay over night}

Tom and i already decided that if i end up in the ICU i will NOT allow anyone to visit me {besides him}. They have an age restriction, so Annabell and Hailey wouldn't be allowed to see me, i think it would be A LOT easier on them if they just wait at home instead of coming to the hospital, not being able to see me, it would break my heart.

ALSO i have some REALLY exciting news :D a few days ago i saw a post in one of my FB groups. the lady is a Birth doula in training, and posted that she is looking for expecting  mothers, she Offers her services free of charge for the first 10 expecting Mom' s. {how awesome is that}. We will meet up tomorrow evening , i am super excited :D OH and the best part, shes GERMAN :) 




well thats it for today. I am off now to snuggle up with the Hubster :)